I know it takes two to tango.
I know I made sure it was you who made the first moves.
I know that, as a grown man, you were more than capable of making your own decisions.
I know that, ultimately, it was you and you alone who decided to listen to your demons and step out in front of a train.
But I still blame myself for everything that happened and the pain it subsequently caused to everyone in our lives.
I still blame myself for not stopping you.
I am so, so sorry for everything.
Which is also the last thing you said to me, face to face.